"Because your steadfast love is better than life,
my lips will glorify you.
I will praise you as long as I live,
and in your name I will lift up my hands."
-Psalm 63:3-4
my lips will glorify you.
I will praise you as long as I live,
and in your name I will lift up my hands."
-Psalm 63:3-4
Ok so there is a lot running through my mind these past few days/weeks/months but there is no way that I can even begin to tell you about all of them right now.. so this is what's up. This summer was amazing in so many different ways, God was so evident, and I was amazed to see how he showed up...
So I wrote the beginning of this post about a week ago now... I am really bad at this, but here's the thing even if I wanted to tell you about my summer you wouldn't even understand.. The easiest way for me to put it is that I traveled over 6,000 miles serving God, and watching him work in teenagers, adults, and my crew and I's lives. All I know is I want to have that feeling that I have when I serve the almighty God all the time. I'm just amazed that he even allows me to be in his plans period, let alone in his plans for other people to come to know him! like that's a big deal. So that's my summer in a nutshell, a really small nutshell... but now on to the present day...
After working and going non-stop 24/7 for the whole summer going home was rough, and being at school is rough. It's a tough adjustment because I was suddenly thrown into nothingness; nothing to do, nobody to talk to about things from this summer, no constant serving. Quite frankly I got/am kind of depressed, okay maybe that's not the right word, I'm just in a blah mood, my mind is very jello-like (technical terms I know). Well that was until about 2 hours ago then I had a talk with one of my best friends. Gosh I love this guy. This talk was refreshing, encouraging, convicting, a wake up call really... It's something that I needed.
This is where I am at now.. I want to be a servant 24/7 not because it benefits me, or makes me look like a good person, but because I love my Savior, and I love that he allows me to serve him, and I love the joy and peace and comfort (I could go on and on, but really there is no way to describe it perfectly) that fills me when I am serving him. I also want to be consumed by the God of the universe, because if I am consumed by him, there is no way that I can be consumed by my struggles. I'm not saying that I won't have them, but those problems will not destroy me, because I will have the creator of everything, the God of the heavens and earth on my side, and well that's just awesome, let's be real. God I want to be able to guard my heart, in fact I want to be able to let you be the guard of my heart, help me to let it go, to give it completely to you so that my entire being will be yours, so that only what you want will fill me. Everything is a heart issue, everything! If your heart is not in the right place, you are not in the right place. No matter what we do, it all comes back to where your heart is and what its motivation is. And I can only pray, that I get to the point that everything that I do whether it be physically, emotionally, mentally, publicly, privately, or spiritually, is because my heart is completely consumed by and in love with and taken over by Jesus. The Psalm at the beginning of this blog is something that I have been dwelling on lately. It dumbfounds me to be honest. It's saying that the love of God is greater than life. Yea I know redundant right? No! I don't think a lot of people understand or even try to understand this. Life is our motivating factor. Our individual lives are our sole reason for everything we do. And this is saying that this Love that God offers is better than any reason we can come up for doing anything. It's better than our being. That's incredible. If we could grasp this we would see that nothing we do matters, and I mean nothing, without God, without his love, without what he does for us. And for me at least, I know this, but I can't grasp it. Trying to grasp how endless the love he has for us is impossible, and I like it that way. I love the fact that I cannot wrap my mind around it, because it leaves me searching for more. It becomes my motivation, now my life is not my motivation but the one this that is better than that is, God's love. The thing that I thought was the most important thing to me, my life, is now fallen to the wayside and replaced by something so much greater Christ. And that's what the Psalmist is getting at I think. Because this love is so powerful all he can do is praise and worship God, and this is what I want. I want my life to be consumed by this love, so that all I can do is praise, and worship, and serve God.
So I wrote the beginning of this post about a week ago now... I am really bad at this, but here's the thing even if I wanted to tell you about my summer you wouldn't even understand.. The easiest way for me to put it is that I traveled over 6,000 miles serving God, and watching him work in teenagers, adults, and my crew and I's lives. All I know is I want to have that feeling that I have when I serve the almighty God all the time. I'm just amazed that he even allows me to be in his plans period, let alone in his plans for other people to come to know him! like that's a big deal. So that's my summer in a nutshell, a really small nutshell... but now on to the present day...
After working and going non-stop 24/7 for the whole summer going home was rough, and being at school is rough. It's a tough adjustment because I was suddenly thrown into nothingness; nothing to do, nobody to talk to about things from this summer, no constant serving. Quite frankly I got/am kind of depressed, okay maybe that's not the right word, I'm just in a blah mood, my mind is very jello-like (technical terms I know). Well that was until about 2 hours ago then I had a talk with one of my best friends. Gosh I love this guy. This talk was refreshing, encouraging, convicting, a wake up call really... It's something that I needed.
This is where I am at now.. I want to be a servant 24/7 not because it benefits me, or makes me look like a good person, but because I love my Savior, and I love that he allows me to serve him, and I love the joy and peace and comfort (I could go on and on, but really there is no way to describe it perfectly) that fills me when I am serving him. I also want to be consumed by the God of the universe, because if I am consumed by him, there is no way that I can be consumed by my struggles. I'm not saying that I won't have them, but those problems will not destroy me, because I will have the creator of everything, the God of the heavens and earth on my side, and well that's just awesome, let's be real. God I want to be able to guard my heart, in fact I want to be able to let you be the guard of my heart, help me to let it go, to give it completely to you so that my entire being will be yours, so that only what you want will fill me. Everything is a heart issue, everything! If your heart is not in the right place, you are not in the right place. No matter what we do, it all comes back to where your heart is and what its motivation is. And I can only pray, that I get to the point that everything that I do whether it be physically, emotionally, mentally, publicly, privately, or spiritually, is because my heart is completely consumed by and in love with and taken over by Jesus. The Psalm at the beginning of this blog is something that I have been dwelling on lately. It dumbfounds me to be honest. It's saying that the love of God is greater than life. Yea I know redundant right? No! I don't think a lot of people understand or even try to understand this. Life is our motivating factor. Our individual lives are our sole reason for everything we do. And this is saying that this Love that God offers is better than any reason we can come up for doing anything. It's better than our being. That's incredible. If we could grasp this we would see that nothing we do matters, and I mean nothing, without God, without his love, without what he does for us. And for me at least, I know this, but I can't grasp it. Trying to grasp how endless the love he has for us is impossible, and I like it that way. I love the fact that I cannot wrap my mind around it, because it leaves me searching for more. It becomes my motivation, now my life is not my motivation but the one this that is better than that is, God's love. The thing that I thought was the most important thing to me, my life, is now fallen to the wayside and replaced by something so much greater Christ. And that's what the Psalmist is getting at I think. Because this love is so powerful all he can do is praise and worship God, and this is what I want. I want my life to be consumed by this love, so that all I can do is praise, and worship, and serve God.
